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A Good Start - On Falling in Love

FB Meyer

No flirting, young people, please! You cannot flit around the flame without the risk of burning your wings; and remember, if these are lost, you cannot get another pair; you may be able to crawl or limp, but you will never again bask in the sunbeams or dance with merry-hearted glee in the shadows. In other words, you may play at love-making till you lose the power of loving truly, or forfeit for evermore the right of entrance into love's most holy place. Finally, you may find it impossible to convince another that for once you are in dead earnest, and that the time of love has come to you at length. There is nothing more terrible in a woman's life than to discover that she has played make-believe so long that men treat her only as their plaything and toy, and think that she is incapable of the true passion. "I mean it this time," the flirt says, by look and manner. "I do not believe you," the answer is cast back, whether by man to woman or by woman to man. "I have watched you narrowly, and can count up the hearts you have broken, the lives you have wrecked. You are a Siren, whose bewitching music beguiles to death." "Nay, but I am genuine this once. I mean what I say." "I do not believe you; I do not believe you; I dare not trust you.

So, whatever you do, young people, don't flirt. Never appear to love when you don't. Never lead another on to think that you really care when you are not sure. Never play with another's affections, for fear you should lead to the giving of what can never be replaced, and for which you have given no equivalent. I am old-fashioned enough to think that a man or woman loves really only once. I know what may be said on the other side, but you must let me think so. The cream only rises to the surface in its full wealth once. The perfect beauty of the morning vanishes an hour after dawn. Therefore, you who have not yet given the one love of your life, do not let it go until you are sure that it is not wrongly bestowed. And you who are seeking the twin soul, be sure of your own love before you give a sign.

Some of the happiest marriages I have known have been those in which the man and wife were boy and girl together. They played the same games, got into the same scrapes, roamed the autumn woods nutting, and skated over the winter ice. But not less happy may those unions be which bare the romantic interest of love at first sight. It is wonderful, this falling in love. A man is going soberly along the path of life, with no particular interest in any one, when suddenly a face, a figure, a voice, crosses his path, and straightway his heart is gone. His ideals are realized, his dreams have taken shape. And from that moment, with that wonderful idealizing faculty, he imputes to that young girl all that the poet in him can imagine, or the artist in him depict. "I don't see anything in the girl," a companion says. But he might, poor purblind mortal, as well expect to see what Turner saw in a sunset. Take care, young girl, that you live up to that ideal. I pray you, do nothing, say nothing, to dash it to the ground; it is the most sacred power love can wield. Live worthy 0f it; do not descend to his level, but lift him, lift him to yours. True love is built on respect.

we can never forget that Robert Browning, when in London, was wont to repair to the church in Marylebone, where he was wed, and kiss the very steps on which his bride had stood. What love was his, of which she sings in those matchless Portuguese Sonnets! But what an inspiration for her, or any woman, to show herself worthy of the ideal which love flings over her every movement, her handwriting, the very trinkets she wears, the books she reads.

If you may not flirt, you should take every means of knowing one another. It seems to me that the practice among the working-classes, of walking out together before there is any thought of love-making, is an eminently wise one. We should hear of fewer ill-assorted marriages among the upper classes, if there were more opportunities of young men and women becoming acquainted with each other than can be presented at a ball or a crush. In the United States, young men can take young girls to places of public amusement without having their names unpleasantly associated by gossip. This were worthy of importation into England.

However it is managed, be sure to know something more of man or woman than is given when either is dressed in Sunday best, and clothed in most attractive and persuasive manners. All is not gold that glitters. Some people are like the baskets of strawberries sold in London streets; all the big ones are at the top, and those below are very, very small. Young ladies! I am sorry to say it, but some of the nicest of nice men are the most arrant scamps that ever walked. Do not believe their word, do not entrust yourselves to them, unless you know something more of them than they say of themselves. And, young men, I would warn you not to think that a girl can be judged by her manners in the drawing-room, or at a picnic. Try to drop in the morning; make an excuse of calling. See how she looks in her morning dress; is it tidy, neat, and suitable; is she helping her mother with the younger children; is she pleasant in her behavior to the servants? I had once to choose a wife for a young working-man, and was assured that my anticipations as to the suitability of a certain maiden were justified, because she opened the door of her father's cottage at ten in the morning with her hair tidy, a neat print dress (the sleeves of which were tucked up above her elbows), and soapsuds were steaming all up her bare arms. "She will do," I said to myself.

Notice, when you are with the one to whom you are attracted, these points: How does the young man speak of his parents? does he call his mother, mother? Does he take an interest in his younger brothers or sisters? Does he attend church for himself, or only because you go with him? Does he ever suggest taking you into the public-house, or to some place of amusement where women are treated with unhallowed familiarity and scant respect?

As a young man acts in any of these respects, you may judge him; and remember, that little unsuspected words and acts on his part are more likely to reveal his true character than any number of protestations and vows. Every man reveals his real self once or twice to the woman he woos; and if only women would act on the slight suspicions which sometimes cross them, how many broken hearts would be saved! Do not suppose that you can alter a man after you are wed. If you cannot fashion him before marriage, you cannot after. A woman dreams that when once she is wife, she will be able to mould her husband to her mind. It is a vain illusion, which in millions of cases has been rudely dissipated. Besides which, are we always able to command the cooperation of the Holy Spirit, especially when we have acted in direct violation of his expostulations?

If you are not sure, don't let your heart go, young girl. Break off an engagement rather than expose your wooer and yourself to lasting misery. It will be kinder to him in the end, because where there is not absolute oneness there cannot be lasting happiness. If he threatens to commit suicide, be well assured he will never do it. He has no right to talk to you like that, and is a coward to play upon your feelings. Besides, a man who talks so lightly of throwing away his own life is not one to whom a woman should entrust hers.

Young men had better consult their mothers or sisters before they take the irrevocable step. Women are quick at reading character, and those that love you will be most likely to choose well for you. Let the women of your family into your secret. Dear souls, they will guess your secret even if you do not tell it, and you may as well tell it; it will please them, and they will advise you well.

There is no harm in early engagements. When I am sure that it is a love-match, and in other respects suitable, I am glad to see two young people drawn together, though in their teens. Probably nothing will more certainly keep them pure and sweet amid the contaminating influences of the world. Let them begin early; it does not matter how long the courtship lasts. The courting times are very happy and blessed times, when young hearts are not too full of hopes and plans and anticipations to enjoy the pathway over which they are passing, and cull its flowers. But in these courting days remember that your relationship be kept on the highest level. It must be spirit to spirit, soul to soul. That which begins and ends with the physical will sooner or later land you both in a ditch. Take care!

Beware! The physical must be the sacrament and expression of the spiritual, else it will widen into the rift that makes love's music mute.

Mind that love-making be only in the Lord. Let it be ensphered in the love of God. Then, like the wedding-ring, the beginning will be everywhere, the end nowhere. For a Christian to marry one who is out of Christ is the grossest folly. Not only is there a flagrant act of disobedience to the distinct command of Christ, but there is the additional certainty that sooner or later there will be manifested an incongruity, a disparity, a want of sympathy in the deepest and most sacred subjects. I have had a wide experience, and been admitted into numberless homes, but I have never seen perfect happiness where this distinct command of the gospel has been violated; and I have never met a case in which the believing partner has won the unbeliever, except when faith may have come to the heart of one after marriage.

Lastly, to all who are unwed, I give my fervent advice: Make it a matter of earnest prayer. Let your heavenly Father choose for you. Do not think that life is necessarily a failure if no supreme love enters it. There are very happy and useful lives on every side that have never been blessed with a supreme affection. Live for God. Make him first. Wait on him and keep his way. In his own good time and way he will give you your heart's desire.

Assurance of Salvation

Assu</p>rance
Are you saved?

Assu

rance

KNOWING THAT YOUR SINS ARE FORGIVEN and that Jesus lives in your heart.
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Seker</p>heid
Is jy weergebore?

Seker

heid

Om te WEET DAT JOU SONDE VERGEWE IS en dat Jesus nou in jou hart woon.
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Rebirth
What Why How..?

Rebirth

What the Bible teaches us about being born again.
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 Weer</p>gebore
Wat Hoekom Hoe..?

Weer

gebore

Wat die Bybel ons leer van wedergeboorte.
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Evangelism Explosion South Africa

Evangelism Explosion South Africa

EE SA is your partner in training believers to reach the world with the Gospel.

EE is recognized as a world leader in the training and equipping of believers to JOYFULLY SERVE and WITNESS TO OTHERS in the world today!

Together, let's Make Evangelism Happen!

www.ee3.org.za

Evangelism

Reach out to your community
Many people today say, "Why should I win souls?" "Isn't the preacher supposed to do that?" Yes! He is but so is every Christian.
Order Gospel Tracts
Resource

Resource

Gospel Tracts for Christian Witnessing and Evangelism Outreach.
Gospel Tract Society is a non-profit Christian ministry devoted to distributing the Word of God in printed tract form.

Gospel Tract Society

Experiencing God's Grace

This tract is available in PDF format.

Download here

5 Colour Child Evangelism

Present the Gospel to children

Use this short guide to present the Gospel to Children using 5 colours. This is also called the 'Wordless book'.

Go to guide

5 Kleure Kinderevangelie

Dra die Evangelie oor aan kinders

Gebruik die kort gids om die Evengelie oor te dra aan kinders met die gebruik van 5 kleure. Dit word ook die 'Woordlose boekie' genoem of die 'Kleure evangelie'.

Gaan na gids

Child Evangelism Fellowship

Child Evangelism Fellowship

Getting equipped

Do you feel called to minister to children?

Resources:

*Literature

*Good News Clubs

*Schools Ministries

*5-Day Clubs

*Ongoing Teacher Training

CEF Resources

Evangelism Cube

eCube
EvangeCube is Born In 1999 the EvangeCube concept was conceived in the field, on an e3 Expedition. The question was asked, "How can we break the language barrier?" and "How can we share the gospel, simply with images, in a way that's compelling and easily transferable?"
e3 Resources

Personal Work

Personal Work is reaching out to people one on one in stead of groups, building a relationship and over time leading them to salvation in Christ Jesus. But it does not end there, this newly saved person now needs to be guided and taught and that is where Discipleship comes in.
Qualifications for Soul Winning

by Dwight L. Moody

1. Shake off the vipers that are in the Church, formalism, pride, and self-importance, etc. 2. It is the only happy life to live for the salvation of souls. 3. We must be willing to do little things for Christ. 4. Must be of good courage. 5. Must be cheerful.

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The Great Commission of Jesus Christ

by Prof. Johan Malan

The Godly mandate of the mission command embraces three different activities that must be carried out. The mission of the Christian church for the whole period between Christ’s first and second comings comprises of an assurance, three commands and a promise.

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The Importance of Personal Soul Winning

by Dr. R. A. Torrey

"He first findeth his own brother Simon…. And he brought him to Jesus."–John 1:41,42. The one who brought his brother to Jesus was Andrew. We are not told that Andrew ever preached a sermon. If he did, the Holy Spirit did not think it worth putting on record. But this brother whom he brought to Jesus preached a sermon that led three thousand people to Jesus in one day.

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Gospel Messages with Infographics

Here are three downloadable infographics to easily share the gospel with anyone. Use the images as a visual reference as you present these short messages to groups or individuals.
The Invitation
The Invitation

Matthew 11:28

Jesus said: “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

This invitation is extended to all mankind, the invitation is to ‘come to Jesus’.

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The Wall
The Wall

Romans 3:23

In this verse, we see that all people have sinned, and that sin separates us from God. Here we will look at the wrong and the right way of destroying this wall of sin.

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The Sheepfold
The Sheepfold

John 10

In John 10:1-16 Jesus uses the comparison of a shepherd and sheep, He is the Shepherd and we are the sheep.

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Evangelie Boodskappe met Illustrasies

Hier is drie aflaaibare illustrasies om maklik die evangelie met enigeiemand te deel. Gebruik die prente as verwysing saam met die boodskappe om vir groepe of enkel persone aan te bied.
Die Uitnodiging
Die Uitnodiging

Mattheus 11:28

Jesus het gesê: “Kom na My toe, almal wat vermoeid en belas is, en Ek sal julle rus gee.” Hierdie uitnodiging word gemaak vir die ganse mensdom, die uitnogiging is ‘kom na My toe’.

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Die Muur
Die Muur

Romeine 3:23

In hierdie vers sien ons dat alle mense gesondig het en dat sonde ons skei van God. Hier sal ons kyk na die verkeerde en die regte manier om die sondemuur af te breek.

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Die Skaapkraal
Die Skaapkraal

Johannes 10

In Johannes 10:1-16 gebruik Jesus die vergelyking van ‘n herder en skape, Hy is die Herder en ons die skape.

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Classes

Bible

JAM offers Evening Bible School Classes on topics like Marriage, Communication and Fundamental Biblical Topics.
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Ministry

Kids

Kids Games / Holiday Bible School / Children’s Services / Training & tools
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Youth
Work

Youth

Camps / Youth Weeks / Youth Days / Services / Bible Studies / Training Youth workers
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Work
Personal

Work

One on one outreach/evangelism is a very effective way of reaching people.
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Helps for new believers

Preparing Your Testimony

How To Give Your Testimony

Next to the Word of God and the power of the Holy Spirit, your personal testimony is probably one of the most powerful ways to witness to someone. Yet many Christians do not know how to go about giving one. They know they are saved, but perhaps do not know how to tell someone else about how becoming a Christian has changed their life.

I want to testify

I am a new Christian

What do I do now?

Eternal life is a gift received from God by faith. You cannot buy it, you cannot earn it, neither can you work to keep it. It is all by grace. "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God; Not of works, lest any man should boast." Ephesians 2:8-9. However, there are certain things God expects from you now.

What must I do?

/The%20Christian's%20Checklist
Here are some questions to ask yourself when you need to make decisions about difficult issues. This is very useful for youth groups and guiding others.
/Om%20‘n%20getuie%20te%20wees
Ons sien die vrug wat by die bekering pas in ons hele lewenswandel - in ons optrede, gesindhede, woorde, dade, denkwyse, voorkoms ens… Die mense naaste aan ons kan die maklikste beoordeel of ons goeie of slegte vrugte dra.
/God%20werk%20in%20ons%20om%20deur%20ons%20te%20kan%20werk
Ons moet God toelaat om in ons te werk. Hierdie voorbeelde wys ons dat dit moontlik is. Ons moet bid dat die Here ons harte en gedagtes sal verander en om aan ons te skaaf. Dit berei ons voor vir die werk wat Hy vir elkeen in gedagte het – om siele te win.

Rev. Shadrak Maloka

/Testimony
mp3
Listen to this powerful testimony of salvation. Late rev. Maloka was an orphaned baby who seemed to have no hope of a future until he met Jesus as his Lord and Savior. He went on to becoming a great evangelist of his time in South Africa.
mp3
Luister na hierdie kragtige getuienis van redding. Wyle ds. Maloka was as baba verwerp en wees gelaat. Dit het vir die kind gelyk of daar geen hoop of toekoms vir hom sou wees nie totdat hy die Here Jesus ontmoet het. Hy het op die ou end 'n groot evangelis en prediker geword van sy tyd in Suid Afrika.

Getuienisse

Luister na hierdie predikers se getuienisse van redding en heiligmaking.

/Ds.%20Hannes%20Delport
mp3
Ds. Hannes Delport, seun van wyle ds. L Delport, is huidiglik predekant van die Vrye Baptiste Kerk Welkom in die Vrystaat.
/Prof.%20Johan%20Malan
mp3
Wyle Prof. Johan Malan, is skrywer van vele artikels en boeke. Hy het homself as 'n evangeliese Christen beskou wat die letterlike, grammaties-historiese vertolking van die Bybel voorstaan.
The Bible will keep you from sin, or sin will keep you from the Bible.
The Way
Jesus is the only Way

The Way

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.”
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Salva</p>tion
Are you sure?

Salva

tion

If you were to die today are you 100% sure you would go to HEAVEN? Yes___ No___?
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From Darkness to Light

by Prof. Johan Malan
The way of salvation plainly shown and explained from the Bible.
Read the article

Uit die Duisternis tot die Lig

deur Prof. Johan Malan
Die pad van redding word duidelik beskryf uit die Bybel in hierdie artikel.
Lees die artikel
The Most Important Question

by R. A. Torrey

That question is this, "What shall I do, then, with Jesus who is called Christ?" "What shall I do, then, with Jesus who is called Christ?" Matthew 27:22 A right decision to that question hangs everything that is really worth having for time and for eternity for each one of us. Let us look at some of the things that we will get if we do the right thing with Jesus Christ.

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Faith and Repentance

by Prof. Johan Malan

In the New Testament doctrine on salvation there is a mutual relationship between the concepts of “faith in Christ” and “repentance”. If we truly believe in Christ, repenting from our evil and selfish ways is inevitable. Faith in Jesus Christ as our Savior can only be expressed by turning away from the spiritual darkness of sin and taking refuge in Him who alone is able to forgive our sins and save our souls.

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Hoe sien God ons?

Deur Ds. N A J van Rensburg

1 Petrus 4:12-19 Teksvers: vers 18 “En as die regverdige nouliks gered word, waar sal die goddelose en die sondaar verskyn?” Die Bybel hou daarvan om die waarheid by wyse van kontras te stel omdat dit so ‘n kragtige wyse is wat die waarheid diep in die hart laat vasslaan. Twee dinge word langs mekaar gestel: die waarheid en die leuen; heiligheid en sonde; die hemel en die hel. Dit is wat ons teksvers doen, die regverdige word teenoor die goddelose gestel.

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Stappe van redding uit die lewe van Saggeüs

deur Madelein Wolfaardt

Lukas 19:1-10 Hy was soekend, hy het besef dat hy iets kortkom ten spyte van al sy rykdom. Hy het moeite gedoen om Jesus te sien. Almal het hom geken en geweet wie hy was, as so 'n bekende ryk man moes dit hom gekos het om sy trots in sy sak te steek en homself te verneder – deur voor almal in die boom te klim. Hy het nie omgegee nie, hy móés Jesus sien!

Lees artikel

Read and download these free booklets

Also great for group or personal Bible study.
Biblical Decision Making
Is it God’s will to “find” His will?
Exactly how should you go about making good, God-honoring decisions?

Read booklet

The Companionship Principle
Bringing Biblical Sanity to the Insanity of Dating
The real reason dating is often "insane" is Christian young people and parents have never consciously shaped their understanding of "dating" with the Bible.

Read booklet

Dinge van Belang
Dinge van Belang vir jong Christene
Hulp en raad aan jong Christene. Die boekie is vol waardevolle wenke en waarskuwings om jou te help op jou pad saam met die Here.

Lees boekie

Identifying False Teachers
A Biblical Checklist for Identifying False Teachers in the Church
The purpose of this booklet is simple: to give you a checklist so that you can identify and avoid Christian leaders whom God would call false.

Read booklet

Testing Today's Prophecy
Does today's "prophecy" measure up to biblical standards?
Should Christians accept the modern prophecy movement as a new work of God’s Spirit?

Read booklet