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Grow in Christ

A Good Start - Tempers, and What to do With Them

FB Meyer

WHAT a shadow is cast over lives and homes by bad tempers! It is Sunday morning, God's day of rest and peace, when the worry and rush of the world should be quiet, and the voices of newspaper boys and hawkers of small wares should be still. A family of little children is waiting to be sweetened and blessed by God, mother, and father. But the mother has become put out over something; she speaks peevishly and crossly, her husband hardly dares put in a word, and the children are scared and talk to one another in whispers. Though there is everything in the pretty home to entrap the sunbeams that play without, a shadow lies over all and mars the day.

Or it is church-time, and the family is late; the husband and father is waiting, ready dressed, for the house of God, but mother or children are unready, and he calls for them, each time in more irritable tones; and when at last they appear, "Late again," "Always your way," "I am tired and out of patience with you," bring some sharp retort, and the rest of the walk to the sanctuary is either spent in silence, or the parents confine their observations to whichever child they happen to be walking with. What good will the service have after such an introduction?

How often has a happy day's excursion been spoiled in the same way! It has been the topic of conversation for weeks. The wife has been hurrying all her work to be ready. Such preparations in dress for herself and the children, such cooking of savory tartlets and cutting of sandwiches. The husband has got off for the day with no little planning. Sunshine augurs a happy excursion. But somehow things don't go right. Perhaps the husband is unreasonable and thoughtless, or gives the wife reason to think that he doesn't appreciate her careful provision; or, perhaps, she is over-tired and nervous, and misinterprets a remark meant quite innocently; but one crosses the other, and the illnatured word, the sour look, the sulking manner, somehow make the whole party miserable--worse than a shower of rain would.

It is impossible to name all the various sorts of ill-temper which vex and curse humanity. The hot temper, which flashes out with the least provocation. The sullen temper, which is a great deal worse to deal with, because it takes so long to come round. The jealous temper, which, in trying to keep all for itself, loses all. The suspicious temper, which is always imputing the worst motives. The malicious temper, which loves to instil the drop of poison, or make the almost imperceptible stab with its stiletto. Ingenuity has sought to discover analogies to these and other forms of bad temper among the lower orders of the animal creation. This is mulish, and that bearish (with the additional allusion, in this case, to the misfortune of a sore head), and the other is viperish. These comparisons are a little hard on our humble friends and companions in this great Noah's ark. Could they speak, they might say that our sin has introduced the jar and discord into their lives that might otherwise have been peaceful and blessed.

People who have a temper are much to be pitied. They know when it is coming on, or has come, and wish they hadn't yielded, and hate themselves for being disagreeable; yet cannot shake themselves loose from the evil thing that has sprung on them as the jaguar on the antelope, or the ague on the traveller in the tropics. They are disposed, however, to fancy that they cannot help themselves. They have inherited it, as they did the color of their hair, or the shape of their nose. Their mother had it before them, and her father before her. If you want them, you must take them as they are or leave them; and then it is, after all, better to be as they are than like some whom they could name. "I grant you I have a hot temper, but then it soon burns itself out, and I am awfully sorry; and as every one must have something, I would rather have this than be unforgiving, or revengeful, or stupid." so I have heard people excuse themselves.

Now there is some truth, no doubt, in this talk about heredity. For good or ill, past generations have left their mark upon us; and parents, especially mothers, cannot too deeply ponder it in their hearts. What they are their children will become; and if there is a strong taint in the blood, an evil tendency in any special direction, there is the more reason why the mother should set herself resolutely to resist it, and replace it by the opposite. There is no doubt that this can be done. It has been done in thousands of instances, and may be done again.

It is impossible to estimate the value of good and sunny temper, which goes through life with a song; looking always on the bright side of things, and yielding to the blows of trial and disappointment with an unfailing grace. It is often associated with a sound constitution and abounding health, and there is undoubtedly a close connection between the two, but it is not dependent on these; for, as the great Dr. Arnold testified of his sister, who was for years a confirmed invalid, but whose chamber was the sunniest room in the house, so suffering and pain have often only set forth to greater advantage the well-spring of sweetness and good-nature which has poured forth like strains of sweet music amid the clatter of a dusty, noisy thoroughfare.

But how may those afflicted with ill-temper be delivered? The Apostle says, "Laying aside all malice, and all guile, and hypocrisies, and envies, and all evil-speakings, as newborn babes, desire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby" (1 Peter 2:1-2). That laying aside is a remarkable expression, for it means that the thing may be done by one sudden, definite act. We are not to wait till these evil things die down in our hearts, but are to make up our minds, once and forever, to lay them aside; as a beggar his rags when new clothes are offered him. It is a definite act of the will. Will you make it now? Will you say, "From this moment I choose to be free of these things, and I deliberately put them off"?

But you fear that this will not help you, you have so often made good resolutions before and broken them. Then take one further step. Trust Christ to keep you. Look up to him and say, "Lord, I have often tried to keep my. temper and failed, but from henceforth I entrust its keeping with thee." Expect him to undertake the charge. Every morning look up into his face .and say, " I am still trusting thee to be between me and my evil past, and to fill me with thy own sweetness, gentleness, and patience." In moments of provocation dare to trust him still, and to hold to the compact by which your helplessness and evil claim everything from his all-sufficiency. Live thus, and you will become known for the very opposite temper to that which has so often caused you poignant regret.

Questions Answered

Here are some articles on different topics, see what the Bible says.

DIE NATUURLIKE EIENSKAPPE VAN GOD WAT VERBAND HOU MET GOD SE WESE SOOS HY IN HOMSELF IS. Alwetend – God weet alles. Hy het volledige kennis van alles in die verlede, hede en die toekoms. (Job 37:16; Ps. 139:1-6). Almagtig – God…
One has only to examine the Bible to find abundant references condemning the use of alcoholic beverages. In fact, if the preacher is to stick to his Bible, preach the whole truth, and be…
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An exposition of the doctrine of eternal punishment in a burning hell for all the unsaved people of all ages. 1. How Can We Know About Hell? “There was a certain rich man, which was clothed in purple and fine…
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Die onderwerp van die doop is baie kontroversieel met baie misverstande. Baie mense dweep met die doop en dit raak 'n obsessie by hulle. Dit veroorsaak baie keer ongebalanseerde en dwase strydvrae met die gevolg dat Christene twis oor die…
Vergifnis is ‘n opdrag in die Woord van God (Matt 6:14, 15; Mark 11:25, 26; Luk 6:37; Efes 4:32 en Kol 3:13). Sonder vergifnis is daar geen bevryding van die seer en pyn wat ander jou aangedoen het nie. Die…

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Loose Lips Sink Ships
I know this has been used as a catchphrase by the military in referring to ships. However, I believe it could be applied to each one of us today. Loose lips can sink more than naval ships. They can…

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Questions Answered

Questions Answered

Being a Christian and drinking alcohol, what does the Bible say?
The Dangers of Moderate Drinking
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Beer and Wine: The Bible’s Counsel
Doesn't the Bible refer in a number of places to wine and strong drink? Don't we quite often find people drinking alcohol in the Bible? Can't we assume, then, that Scripture generally does not condemn drinking alcoholic beverages? It's true that…

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A collection of articles written by FB Meyer. Practical advice for the daily Christian life.

A NEW YEAR is opening before us, and there is some satisfaction in feeling that an opportunity will be afforded of making a really new start. Each true heart in which there is a spark of the Divine life turns eagerly towards the unblemished page, the untrodden way, of the…
BENEATH all exaggeration there is a basis of truth. When an American said that the whey which flowed from the making of a large cheese in his country was sufficient to run three sawmills; and when another affirmed that the soil of his farm was so prolific that the tendrils…
To be straight is to be true. There is no more important exhortation on the page of Scripture, than where the Apostle says, "Whatsoever things are true . . . think on these things." A friend of mine, educated in one of our great English schools, says that the most formative words of…
WHAT a shadow is cast over lives and homes by bad tempers! It is Sunday morning, God's day of rest and peace, when the worry and rush of the world should be quiet, and the voices of newspaper boys and hawkers of small wares should be still. A family of…
No flirting, young people, please! You cannot flit around the flame without the risk of burning your wings; and remember, if these are lost, you cannot get another pair; you may be able to crawl or limp, but you will never again bask in the sunbeams or dance with merry-hearted…
LONGFELLOW'S village blacksmith felt that "something accomplished, something done," had earned a night's repose; and I suppose that he did little else than shoe the farmers' horses, or put new shares to their ploughs; yet he had the perpetual consciousness that he was doing something in the world, contributing to…
No wonder that the common people hung on Christ's words. He was a Master of the Art of Illustration, because he sought his emblems, not from remote corners of creation, or its recondite processes, but from the common incidents of ordinary human experience. Salt and light, birds and lilies, gates…
Everyone needs some guidance on where to start reading and how to read their Bible. Below are Afrikaans & English printables - give it to every young believer that you give a Bible to.
Tips on reading your Bible

Where should I start?

Start by reading a chapter in the morning and evening. Mark in your Bible and write in a notebook everything that stands out in the chapter you read.

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Wenke om jou Bybel te lees

Waar moet ek begin?

Lees jou Bybel in orde, moet nooit rondspring tussen boeke en hoofstukke nie. Hou by jou lees skedule, as jy laas Markus 1 gelees het lees jou nou Markus 2.

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'n Rein hart gevul met die Heilige Gees

Met die ondervinding van wedergeboorte (Joh. 3:3) én die bevestiging daarvan deur die getuienis van die Heilige Gees (Rom. 8:16), vind ‘n radikale verandering van lewenswyse plaas (2 Kor. 5:17). Hierna volg ‘n proses van selfontdekking wat lei tot die behoefte aan ‘n dieper innerlike verlossing (vrymaking) en reiniging van die inwonende sonde asook die vervulling met die Heilige Gees.
In Heb 3 & 4 wys die skrywer vir ons die wonderlike belofte van God se rus, wat ‘n rein en oorwinnende lewe in Christus is. Hy vertel van hierdie belofte, en dan vermaan hy die Hebreërs in hoofstuk 5:12-14 dat hulle moet voortgaan na volwassenheid want hulle is nog kinders in die geloof.
Hier besef die weergebore Christen dat ‘n dieper werk in sy hart benodig word. Dat daar dinge is waaraan hy dalk nog vasklou of sonde wat hy nie wil laat staan nie of hy twyfel en vertrou God nie volkome nie. Hier gaan ons kyk na wat die stryd in ons binneste is en hoe om die pad na heiligmaking te begin.
deur Marius Wolfaardt Christen Leefstyl
Kol 2:6: Soos julle dan Christus Jesus, die Here, aangeneem het, wandel so in Hom, 1. Watookal die Here vir jou sê, doen dit. Joh 2:5 “Sy moeder sê vir die dienaars: Net wat Hy vir julle sê, moet julle doen.” - Moenie meer of minder doen nie, doen net dit wat Hy gesê het. Matt 28:20 “En kyk, Ek is met julle al die dae tot aan die voleinding van die wêreld. Amen.” – As ek doen wat Hy sê sal Hy met my wees. Doen wat Jesus sou gedoen het. Meet alles altyd hieraan.
by Marius Wolfaardt Christian Lifestyle
Col 2:6 As therefore ye received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, 1. Whatever the Lord tells you to do, do it. Joh 2:5 “His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever he saith unto you, do it.” Don't do more or less, but, just that which He tells you to do. Mat 28:20 “teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I commanded you: and lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world.” If you do what He tells you to do, He will be with you unto the end of the world. Always do what Jesus would do, measure everything according to this rule.
deur Marius Wolfaardt Christen Leefstyl
Hoe hanteer ek dit?

Mat 5:4 Salig is die wat treur, want hulle sal vertroos word.
Binne in die moeilike tye is die Here reeds besig om iets nuuts te maak, al sien jy dit nie raak terwyl jy in die vuur is of deur die rivier gaan nie. God het ‘n plan. Rou is natuurlik en is iets wat moet gebeur, dit is ‘n proses om deur te werk, maar daarna moet jy ook aan beweeg en nie hier vasval nie.

Assurance of Salvation

Is jy weergebore?



Om te WEET DAT JOU SONDE VERGEWE IS en dat Jesus nou in jou hart woon.
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What Why How..?


What the Bible teaches us about being born again.
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Wat Hoekom Hoe..?



Wat die Bybel ons leer van wedergeboorte.
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English Sermons

English Sermons

Here is a link if you would like to listen to audio sermons by various preachers. Promoting Genuine Biblical Revival.

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